tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-124033762011-04-21T18:28:24.084-07:00"there is only one perfect moment in every moment under heaven for any single occurance or event!"James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.comBlogger861100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-58353807076467363182007-03-25T22:11:00.001-07:002007-03-25T22:36:48.446-07:00

I found this to be an interesting movie, but not in the sense of global warming as much as prophetic reality. Here's a little link to click through if you're interested in purchasing the dvd, however, if you're like me? you'll go to blockbuster :P and rent it heh However, all things being equal, the one thing in this movie that stood out for me is the amazing reality that we are the architects of

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-32697380819096380922007-03-22T20:40:00.000-07:002007-03-24T08:12:42.233-07:00

so then! it seems that indeed, this is providence towards what has instantly occured! it is a blessing to have these events. So what events? well, as I had disconnected my rogers isp account, my yahoo 360 blog (which up to this point has rather been my mainstay) has been "deleted" heh.of course "deleted" only means (if I assume correctly to the functionality of IT and all of its disjointed

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1149740576035810102006-06-07T21:07:00.000-07:002006-06-07T21:25:06.740-07:00

so then. I've been at my mom's now for two days. She's seems to be better, and in better spirits, and i hope that it is related to my visit here :)I have to wait a few more weeks before I can carry on to amsterdaam, so hopefully in that time i can convince her to come with... it'll be fun for her, and well, she should do something before she goes home (God, heaven, etc etc).My dog remembered me

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1149059802673797192006-05-31T00:03:00.000-07:002006-05-31T23:53:51.543-07:00

so my flight leaves in 6 more days.I'm now a sub-contractor for the same company; doing projects that aren't bound or limited to legacy builds. My methods are too far ahead...not that this matters of course, as I can program in many languages, and I speak many as well, so travel isn't an issue for me. And of course, I'm male. And whether anyone here in north america has a clue, its still a

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1148457505499151432006-05-24T00:49:00.000-07:002006-05-24T00:58:25.520-07:00

So I get to go home...mom is going home.I leave the people here, to be with her, because I need to be with her, to retain my family, remind them of our right, our priviledge, and our history...everything is on schedule.I knew before that I would be the one to retain us...and I'm free as I should be at the time when I should be :)for her sake, and my sake,a and His sake, by His promise to me...a

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1148002998988867682006-05-18T18:29:00.000-07:002006-05-18T18:43:19.013-07:00

well, i've not written here in awhile, and since I'm watching all these computers install, update, scan, and defrag; i figured i'd take a few minutes out to just do that...so my roomies and i've been talking about coy dogs... mostly figuring out that women, here in vancouver, if they've been here for any time at all, turn into coydogs...and that the guys let them do it. so what is a coydog

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1147155568524889412006-05-08T23:09:00.000-07:002006-05-08T23:19:28.536-07:00

pappa?you are a bizarre and interesting God.i don't understand you at all.i do and then things like this happen and I don't.what is it that you priviledge me with this?i know i don't deserve it at all, and I know I'm not worthy of it,yet, still you do so.a friend, who is a friend, who is also someone who embodies everything I desire.and all at that time, I can't be who i am, which you created me

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1147048761325817332006-05-07T17:34:00.000-07:002006-05-07T17:39:21.326-07:00

holy crap :Ohow can it be SO HARD to just be happy hehyeah thats it, wear black!!! but wait, not just that, add black mascara under your eyes, yeah yeah, that'll show em... *busting my ass laughing* oh but wait... stretch yourself, show your individuality (holds L to forehead cuz you can't see it yourself), and get a *aghast look* perhaps a CHINESE OR JAPANESE character tattoo..............

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1146959158680419812006-05-06T16:09:00.000-07:002006-05-07T15:36:27.766-07:00

so i'm gaining the weight back that i've lost, and now... my clothes aren't fitting.i have to buy all new stuff.mind you, that's not so bad actually, cuz i like a lot of the styles, and it'll give me all new gear from my trip. and i already know that i clean up pretty nicely.i can get rid of that suit now as well, as it hasn't been worn since whiner and I split up. its too small anyway now,

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1146894949702274162006-05-05T22:52:00.000-07:002006-05-05T22:55:49.703-07:00

i've met a lot of goths lately.if i knew then what I knew now, i'd have been a lot happier. They're all the same. morbid, whiney, oh woe is me, wah, and pathetic. stoned most of the time; think they're spiritual as they go about being self focused and useless to the world. treat sex the same way they treat drugs. something to do to keep them thinking of what they've screwed up. and they all suck

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1146870661405376502006-05-05T16:01:00.000-07:002006-05-05T22:51:42.883-07:00

FINALLY!!!!!good sex :)k, clearly this isn't a concern to me any longer.the last girl i was with, i couldn't stay hard, and i though, huh, maybe being over 40 now had something to do with it, however, that obviously isn't the case :)the woman i was involved with this time, actually wants to be with me, and isn't playing some self focused, eh i'll use whomever i want till i'm bored.the last girl i

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1146041436780150812006-04-26T01:47:00.000-07:002006-04-27T06:00:42.390-07:00

Reminiscence I - this moment to thus past,for the bliss I find upon each cast,toward discovery with love for self perceived,each moments gleaming - truest weakness weaved...for now upon this straightest path of mine,without the finite knowing each past sign.-- its glorious this road of life,to navigate tween fire and strife,without the answers truly bourne,each with the joy and thus forlorn,for

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1146040623802436392006-04-26T01:36:00.000-07:002006-04-26T01:37:03.823-07:00

Reminiscence I - from this moment to thus past,upon the education I find, upon each cast,toward discovery of love and self perceive,within a moments truest weakness weaves...for now upon this truest path of mine,without the finite knowing each past sign.-- its glorious this road of life,to navigate tween fire and strife,without the answers truly bourne,each with the joy and thus forlorn,for

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1145922051447641292006-04-24T16:38:00.000-07:002006-04-24T16:40:51.460-07:00

hola :)so its monday, and i'm having a wonderous day. :)it was a pretty good weekend as well. we set out the lawn chairs in the backyard and setup the dartboard, bbq'd burgers and such and friends wandered in and out all day long :)ahhh, the life of riley.its been rather a good day as well at the office. I have a new desk and location and its quieter and more out of the way, which is how i like

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1145664896882113182006-04-21T17:09:00.000-07:002006-04-21T17:14:56.900-07:00

Faust was an excellent opera.Its listed as three acts, however, I think it was originally written as 4 acts, as it functioned that way..there was a pause between the first and second acts, and then again after the intermission between the last 2 acts...so i'm pretty sure it was 4 acts, with three intermissions.however, it was quite a brilliant performance :)I'm was wondering what language it was

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1145466488362566052006-04-19T10:05:00.000-07:002006-04-19T10:09:36.513-07:00

well I'm apparantly going to see Faust tomorrow night :)3 row orchestra pit front and center stage.Synopsis:Faust By Charles GounodAct IIn his study, Faust, an aging scientist, despairs over the emptiness of a life spent seeking knowledge. He resolves to take poison but hesitates out of fear. Cursing life, and God himself, he invokes Satan, who appears in the form of the dapper demon,

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1145402233537524002006-04-18T15:55:00.000-07:002006-04-18T17:26:24.466-07:00

its actually a pretty good life.My schedule is my own. I have friends that have moved out from back home; my other friend just came back here from Germany;I'm planning a trip to eastern europe and the russian federation; and I'm discovering that this working out, and shorter hair has made me look more normal and its nice :)i guess I shouldn't be surprised at the attention i recieved last night;

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1145349405327138662006-04-18T01:20:00.000-07:002006-04-18T01:36:45.356-07:00

tonight was fun :Dk, well today i went to work and didn't intend on going out. I was out at lunch and was craving fish and chips for absolutely no reason at all. sittin on the outdoor patio I saw maria walk by :OI thought she'd returned to germany :anyway, I called out to her and she came and sat, and we ate fish and chips and had a nice guiness, and then two and then three, and talked about

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1145298059443651452006-04-17T11:18:00.000-07:002006-04-17T11:22:18.006-07:00

I will not listen to this crap anymore. now, I pray it three times a day, and I will swing the sword, and they will see their lives become cesspools, and their dreams become nightmares; by the words of their own mouths and the contents of their own hearts.they will reap what they sow in their ignorrance of God and those who serve Him.I am a child of God and moreso, I am a warrior. I have always

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1145207146884861932006-04-16T09:42:00.000-07:002006-04-16T10:10:30.640-07:00

hello hello there james my journal counterpart :)K. So that was good to get out of the way. prayer is such an easy thing to do. You know pappa? i've always wondered why people put on this false spirituality in order to make themselves seem more intune, and pious.You've never been like that, and well, most of whom have served you, have been major pains in the establishments hiney's. Going all the

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1145201084648377162006-04-16T08:06:00.000-07:002006-04-16T08:24:44.663-07:00

ok satan you're starting to get on my nerves. you don't get to infect my dreams with the events of those in my past, whether recent or just acquainted. you don't have that kind of power over me. you don't get to inflict me with recent pains from your children whom you put in my life to take me from the truth of the power of who and what i am created to be.so this stops now!in the name and

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1145134623146706922006-04-15T13:55:00.000-07:002006-04-16T05:40:15.596-07:00

Hi,so then, i hope things are well with you. I hope that the youngen is growing up strong and happy.I'm writing this letter for 2 reasons. 1 because it has to be done for my own sake; as God has shown it to me; and secondly to thank you.When we met, i was still hurt and frightened and broken from all that Laurie had done to me in her hatred. she still is incidently, however, i forgive her, it is

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1145133388691273472006-04-15T13:16:00.000-07:002006-04-15T13:40:31.810-07:00

You know? I'm not lonely. Haven't been for as long as I can remember. K, well I do remember being lonely before; when I swapped out my life of debauchary for a life of promises by God.It was hard, and i know I'm not the only person in the history of man to change my life on a dime; and be and do the things I knew I was; instead of the things I was actually doing which all were not at all anything

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1144894648655876772006-04-12T19:15:00.000-07:002006-04-12T19:17:28.666-07:00

sometimes starbucks has value...antediluvianMain Entry: an·te·di·lu·vi·an Pronunciation: "an-ti-d&-'lü-vE-&n, -(")dI- Function: adjective- Etymology: ante- + Latin diluvium flood -- more at DELUGEof or relating to the period before the flood described in the Biblemade, evolved, or developed a long time ago ie: - antediluvian noun

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1144880290785126902006-04-12T14:32:00.000-07:002006-04-12T15:26:47.136-07:00

intellesting eh? I was thinking about whom i know and what i'm doing, and the different girls/guys I've known in my past; as well as my present.it occurred to me that since being in Vancouver, I've more or less been acquainted with those lesser then those whom I've known previously. I guess it didn't occur to me prior, that this town is basically blue collar, and rather redneck. That Vancouver

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1144801327700208132006-04-11T17:17:00.000-07:002006-04-11T17:27:25.206-07:00

k, check this out.downstairs room mate. has his own place, isn't sharing, no room mates, private entrance.this is the second time this moron has tried this scam."hey I can get a great weight set, so if you both will put it in the spare room in your place upstairs (cuz you see i don't have the room) and we split the price three ways, we can all use it!! and when i leave I'll take it with me, so it

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1144621227289817012006-04-09T15:19:00.000-07:002006-04-09T15:25:25.920-07:00

create your own visited countries mapor vertaling Duits Nederlandsthese are all the places I've either visited or lived :)over 39 countries, yet only 17% of the globe.there are over 450 countries in the world, giver or take a regime change or two at any given time; so if anyone thinks that they're clued in? they're not, cuz the fact is, there are too many cultures, and too much diversities, to

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1144347727769904682006-04-06T11:21:00.000-07:002006-04-11T17:30:27.073-07:00

... for thou shalt not pierce or mark your flesh as the heathens do, who do not know me, and worship idols......for they pursue vanity and practice divination; teaching the things temporal as godly, and they are not godly......practicing sexual immoralities, and sacrificing to idols, saying to abstain from what I've declared holy, teaching the precepts of men, not the precepts of God...(when will

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1144281428984527942006-04-05T16:51:00.000-07:002006-04-05T16:57:09.016-07:00

Wow. Things are really moving along :) I heard from Tanya today. She'll be off school in a bit, and is thinking of coming to van sooner than later. :) I haven't seen her in ages. It'll be fun. She's one of those yanks, that should've been a canadian, cuz she's not a narrow minded bigotted ignnorant....rare as that may be...anyway, having said that, I've also been talking to corrie after not

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1144138823590426162006-04-04T01:09:00.000-07:002006-04-04T01:20:23.636-07:00

it was supposed to be a casual get together... little did i know that so many folks would turn up :) and it was a good mix. the two things that stick in my mind were these:"you're very hospitable and a great host!""and you know there wasn't anyone at the party that I didn't get along with!"resounding good news from all comers :)i have good taste in friends. its a nice reflection on who i am, so

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1144044680315415072006-04-02T23:09:00.000-07:002006-04-02T23:11:20.330-07:00

5 words or less:damn hella good time....g'night ;-)

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143890492640462942006-04-01T03:12:00.000-08:002006-04-01T03:21:32.656-08:00

its 3:11 amI've shopped, spoken to an old friend, a good friend. and, i've been reaquainted with a brilliance.T double r or double e, i don't actually know to be quite honest; however, we'll see i suppose the next time I see her to ask.I've been acquainted for about 6+ months ( i don't keep track), and she's intelligent, attractive, and trustworthy. Things that for me, are amazing to see.none

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143849925401322102006-03-31T15:59:00.000-08:002006-03-31T16:06:24.526-08:00

Interesting stuff :) I get rid of all the dross in my life and guess what happens?God returns everyone to my life, whom knows Him. I don't mean flakes that think they know Him with their pseudo spirituality embracing the universe and sexual "liberation" (that always cracks me up, why is it that the sexually liberal always end up w/ std's? thngs that make you go hmmmmm.... heh)got an email from

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143833884117091432006-03-31T11:35:00.000-08:002006-03-31T11:38:04.133-08:00

well holy honking who'da thunk it??? :OI think that there will be a few folks from work coming as well... what the ?????well whatever, no worries, better a diversity of eclectic pal's then no pals at all eh?what a mix. : wiccans (and we all know what i think of thier spun little "i have power, I like myself and I am worthy" crap), christians (oughtta make for some entertaining dialogue

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143824048228859372006-03-31T08:44:00.000-08:002006-03-31T08:54:08.246-08:00

So then,the big weekend has arrived :Droomy and I have to buzz to costco early tonight and pick up all that meat :O 300$ worth of fresh steaks, lamb, lobster, chicken etc... mikey said he's bringing beef ribs so he's gonna meet us tonight early after work, and Teresa is bringing evenascence.... yes the band evenescence. they were at her club, cuz apparantly they hang out here in van on occasion,

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143794230347594702006-03-31T00:29:00.000-08:002006-03-31T00:37:10.370-08:00

runes... well in ten words or less.. they're rocks. the druids used em and they're extinct.do you really think that the rocks are smarter after all these hundreds of years?everyone that was ever truly spiritual, didn't have an air of spirituality about them. they were to cognative to put on that rediculious form of godliness. besides, true spirituality is the fullest realization that man is

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143684012913013482006-03-29T17:49:00.000-08:002006-03-29T18:00:12.933-08:00

when people write in thier online journals and try to present something that is sublime, while they're struggling internally?when they attempt to represent a peace which they do not have?when they claim a relationship with a higher power, and their writing proves that there is none?when they claim power, and their actions show weakness and fear?these and a million other things cross my mind,

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143677225136567442006-03-29T16:06:00.000-08:002006-03-29T16:07:05.163-08:00

John 1 says, “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing was made that was made. In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.”In the Greek, the word used for comprehend can also be

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143657471209600242006-03-29T10:26:00.000-08:002006-03-29T10:37:51.266-08:00

has anyone besides me ever wondered how anyone can say "its you and so and so that are my evil and what hurts me" and claim the innocence of zero contribution?God has said, "it is evil that eats and wipes its mouth and says I have done no evil" and it is a fool that blames everyone else for its suffering, and claims no accountability.Lord? I have often wondered why you allow people to be deluded?

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143481330285784862006-03-27T09:17:00.000-08:002006-03-27T11:28:04.566-08:00

so then, it seems as though the truth is more difficult when i know it before hand.after all, i knew that there are just certain perfect realities in the universe; and well, as sad as that is, i just have to start listening to God again. 1: I shouldn't have gotten involved with anyone that had anything to do with Kevin, cuz after all, he - although attempting to be decent - is ultimately self

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143252649404613172006-03-24T17:52:00.000-08:002006-03-24T18:10:49.420-08:00

Its been an easy day. :)woke up over looking english bay with the mountains all bright. There was a bit of rain, however, it was all good. I didn't get alot of sleep, however, that wasn't my fault. Girls like to keep boys up at night and then say that its the boy that kept them up. shrugs, no worries.so tonight, three steaks on the bbq, and of course, movies, mikey and his brother, and prolly

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143246755495133062006-03-24T16:26:00.001-08:002006-03-24T16:32:48.413-08:00

well, I could be wrong this time. she may have actually broken that chain. :)i just read her journal and it turns out she has a new job. and she sounds happy about it! Good for her! finally!man, it would've been nice to see that happen when i was with her, instead of what did happen.however, nonetheless, perhaps all things are as they should be :)i'm happy, she seems to be finally getting what

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143241772700590022006-03-24T14:54:00.000-08:002006-03-24T15:10:06.086-08:00

this is pretty damn cool. Everything is back. Mikey came back from back east, and man its good to see him. Old friends, new friends; dumped the crappy wah friends; no more bars or losers in my life.lets inventory it shall we?i have an amazingly honest and upstanding room-mate; the first one I've been able to trust since I've been in vancouver. All the rest came from the cambie, and as i've stated

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1143236788505011562006-03-24T13:21:00.000-08:002006-03-24T13:53:21.316-08:00

well, this has all turned out interestingly enough.I was alone for awhile before this last girl, and maybe that's why I ended up with her? K, so in her defense, she isn't really that bad. She's young, laced with all the over dramatized morose over exaggerations of suffering, and self obsessed indulgent teenage rhetoric.mind you though, i've been with other women, and even those whom i've been

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1138089098829923372006-01-23T23:33:00.000-08:002006-01-23T23:51:38.863-08:00

so,here we are, almost to the end of the first month of the new year. technically i'm finished my contract at SFU, in reality i'm miles away from actually having the application finished to even remotely my standards...of course, there are politics, underestimated timelines, dramatic resultant changes from the onset of the contracted project.i was hired to build a job search board, and a resume

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1137660808173722692006-01-19T00:50:00.000-08:002006-01-19T00:53:28.190-08:00

well i want to write stuff, however, its 10 to 1 am, and i'm tired, jaynie is about to go to bed and well, i'm not conflicted about cuddling someone who just fits so perfectly in ever conceiveable cuddling position... :) kinda cool actually.and thank god she doesn't toss and turn all night :)so anyway, here is a link to my gallery cuz it's a better explatory (i think i just made that word up).>>

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1136445077462685692006-01-04T22:54:00.000-08:002006-01-04T23:11:17.490-08:00

well its the new year.... 2006... yup... its true... another number added to the tally...shrugs... so i'm trying to figure out a few things... i'm pretty ready to justbail and head out... check out again for a few years, and not get involved in all the self focused materialism that all the "i'm not materialistic" people arebusy practicing...ironically, i've a great woman in my life... and the

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1131925378440179092005-11-13T15:39:00.000-08:002005-11-13T15:42:58.460-08:00

i wish i may... i wish i might, run from this thing that has given me such frightI wonder what would happen if i allowed myself to fall in love.Loving is easy; all i need to do is treat others equal to me; ofcourse, i can be selective, and choose whom, when, what, and where...however, now? i'm wondering.half of me wants to run away and take a trip and wish for this, and notever deal with it, when

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1131855256637356182005-11-12T20:01:00.000-08:002005-11-14T09:15:05.056-08:00

Upon the wondrous ambition of life; Comes the inevitable realization of mortality;which - in and of itself - makes a mockery of perpetual existence.irony of ironies; the beauty of current time and space...I have learned great things in this last few weeks...love, guilty, self perception...intriguing as all of this has been.the gift of perfection, is a gift best not overlooked...for each of us, is

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1127457613916232262005-09-22T23:38:00.000-07:002005-09-22T23:40:13.926-07:00

hi, k, so i'm busy. uber busy.building building building.working, working working..i'll catch it all up in a bit however at this juncture it's about quick recaps;1: good job2: new place3: new car (shopping, not bought yet - gas considerations wahhhhhhhh)4: girls, too many girls, no prospects yet, however, a good horizon from where i sit5: hanging w/ buds on my spare time6: hanging w/ my buds

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1125521552283423912005-08-31T13:38:00.000-07:002005-08-31T13:52:32.290-07:00

heh, i think that things are finally going my way. After trusting a bevy of fuckwads, i now have the freedom of independence, without need to consult, discuss or even inform anyone else of my choices/decisions etc etc, while they say, "that's not such a good idea" with all the advantages of just having it work cuz i was correct in the first place and not led around by the fear with the harness in

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1121544431651124742005-07-16T12:55:00.000-07:002005-07-16T13:07:11.656-07:00

I used to be able to make sense of stuff. Cuz well, folks are generically predictable. Take self obsession, add denial, subtract 15 years from their age for emotional maturity; and then add pms for women and alcohol for me....tada the average person; no matter what crap about their "goodness" that they feed themselves.but now?well, no matter what i think about folks; which is generally far too

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1120897016741427602005-07-09T01:07:00.000-07:002005-07-09T01:16:56.746-07:00

friends can be assholes sometimesits true...k picture this if you will...boy, has g/f. is going out w/ ex g/fwants g/f to be there (first of all, this is fucked to begin with)asks me to meet him there with her.i'm "um, no... that is wierd"other friend callsgonna be there, now i have a reason to go.so i'm sure, but you be there, or i'll be pissed off, cuzi'm not babysitting your g/f or your

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1120264673289021502005-07-01T17:36:00.000-07:002005-07-01T17:37:53.293-07:00

How a BOY withdraws cash from ATM.1. Park the car2. Go to ATM Machine3. Insert card4. Enter PIN5. Take money out6. Take ATM Card out7. Drive awayHow a GIRL withdraws cash from ATM1. Park the car2. Check makeup3. Turn off engine4. Check makeup5. Go to ATM6. Hunt for ATM card in the purse7. Insert card8. Hit Cancel9. Hunt in purse for chit with PIN written on it10. Insert card11. Enter PIN12. Take

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1117741130690346112005-06-02T12:38:00.000-07:002005-06-02T12:38:50.696-07:00

Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1000 miles to the gallon.In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:"If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1117580821556893002005-05-31T16:05:00.000-07:002005-05-31T16:07:01.560-07:00

never underestimate the power of indifference laced with suspicion... if you're ever on the recieving end of that? beware! you're heart and soul will be stripped to nothing...because those subjecting you to it? will not at all care, as they do it and eat and wipe their mouths claiming they've done nothing wrong... and they can only claim it cuz you didn't catch them at it...

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1116780889367630952005-05-22T09:52:00.000-07:002005-05-22T09:56:10.720-07:00

listenI wanted you to know I love the way you laughI wanna hold you high and steal your pain awayI keep your photograph and I know it serves me wellI wanna hold you high and steal your pain‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesomeAnd I don’t feel right when you’re gone awayYou've gone away, you don't feel me, anymoreThe worst is over now and we can breathe againI wanna hold you high, you steal my pain

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1116722472331465862005-05-21T17:39:00.000-07:002005-05-21T17:41:12.336-07:00

listenThere's a pain that sleeps insideIt sleeps with just one eyeAnd awakens the moment that you leaveThough I try to look awayThe pain it still remainsOnly leaving when you're next to meDo you know, that everytime you're nearEverybody else seems far awaySo can you come and make them disappearMake them disappear and we can staySo I stand and look aroundDistracted by the soundsOf everyone and

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1116695454312566552005-05-21T10:10:00.000-07:002005-05-21T17:18:07.906-07:00

listenLooking back at me I seeThat I never really got it rightI never stopped to think of youI'm always wrapped up inThings I cannnot winYou are the antidote that gets me bySomething strongLike a drug that gets me highWhat I really meant to sayIs I'm sorry for the way I amI never meant to be so cold to youAnd I'm sorry about all the liesMaybe in a different lightYou could see me stand on my own

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1116632845552950932005-05-20T16:47:00.000-07:002005-05-21T17:18:35.746-07:00

listenHoney you are a rockUpon which I standAnd I come here to talkI hope you understandThat green eyesYeah the spotlight shines upon youAnd how could anybody deny youI came here with a loadAnd it feels so much lighterNow I met youAnd honey you should knowThat I could never go on without youGreen eyesHoney you are the seaUpon which I floatAnd I came here to talkI think you should knowThat green

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1116135295123327112005-05-14T22:34:00.000-07:002005-05-14T22:35:39.473-07:00

fear is a wonderful attribute of life,God allows it,satan uses it,people are either driven or trapped by it,fear has three distinct qualities,it enables the quality of combat,it enables the quaility of flight,and it paralyzes.now, flight and paralysis are disabling attributes,those that do not understand fear suffer from this.combat - or fight - is an enabling attribute,those that have a source

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115631352150036962005-05-09T02:34:00.000-07:002005-05-12T21:06:40.303-07:00

i looked at the top of the river and noticed the rapids and rocks and the clefts in the stream.I also noticed the calm spots and pools of contentment within it.At first when i started upon this river, i gripped the sides being buffeted from one rock to the other; and in some cases, being stuck in undertows and whirlpools fighting to break clear.It was in one of these whirlpools early on in this

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115626073641482272005-05-09T01:03:00.000-07:002005-05-09T01:07:53.646-07:00

k... so i've decided and finalized with this design. which is more or less the same design as the blog template for my poetry blogExcept of course this blog will have a different image. I still have to add the integrated mp3 player for all the blogs for everyone on my servers, so that each person can upload tunes for the readers listening pleasure... however, i haven't decided yet how i want to

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115545445888197842005-05-08T02:42:00.000-07:002005-05-08T02:46:34.016-07:00

k, so this one is decent enough, it work in ie and moz/firefox.... sweat yippee :Dcourse, it'll get old and boring pretty quick and of course, soon enough, i'm going to want to change it, and will probably just build a few custom blog templates for myself using css and tables and granola bars and tar and feathers, actually cuz of my nature to get bored so quickly, i'm prolly gonna build myself a

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115484131124687952005-05-07T09:40:00.000-07:002005-05-07T09:46:45.743-07:00

kiss on the lips - you're sweet and simple butquite daring. you move for the kill confidentlyknowing the other person wants the same thing.What Sign of Affection Are You?brought to you by Quizilla 

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115453624668440322005-05-07T01:08:00.000-07:002005-05-07T01:17:15.546-07:00

so...after configuring two full blogs and a placeholder blog, i find out... that there is an image placement issue w/ the main blog in firefox :the upside is, that i can fix it cuz its on my server by either testing the browser, or modifying the css... the down-side is, its 1:11am on saturday morning, and i bloody well don't feel like it....after all, i just created a poetry blog for all the

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115409495366546552005-05-06T12:56:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:24:28.133-07:00

heh,I just found this from another blog cuz of a search I did based upon a conversation with a pal in australia...http://www.hugi.is/hahradi/bigboxes.php?box_id=51208&f_id=1211I found it at this blog >> http://www.livejournal.com/users/kelsoggy/it is great comedy! I have a lot of american friends, and I'm soooooooooo grateful that none of them sound like these people; whom represent the bulk of

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115406495151965262005-05-06T12:04:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:26:17.446-07:00

So far I've tested two api's for the blogger/server integration....DoPost and Zoundry.Both function adaquately as post text/wysiwyg editors.Both fail miserably as image integrators.this is going to require some thought... and if this turns out to be a headache, i'm just going to build my own... cuz dammit, it isn't that hard to create an integrated ftp client to upload images...1: you test the

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115402234750634752005-05-06T10:36:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:27:07.913-07:00

the wonder of the moments when i reflect,to see the pain inflicted through my introspect,i wonder how we hurt each other every time we speak,from that which was the gifted truth of what it was we seek,and yes, its sad that each of us desire to just hurt,toward the other quickly with a word that cuts with curt,we say, "oh this and that to you" because its what so aches,and neither of the pride

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115366242090792432005-05-05T23:53:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:28:22.866-07:00

I have decided to write about something I know about... As opposed to static ramblings of innocuous pointless dribble. This has come about because I've been asked about the number of women that I've slept with prior to my relationship with God, which then determines the sudden drop in my promiscuity and such.Now, don't misunderstand me. I'm just as horny as before, and rut and ache for it as much

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115279278896357742005-05-05T00:18:00.000-07:002006-06-07T21:28:59.826-07:00

01: I have a 167 IQ02: I speak (only) four languages03: I have traveled to over 30 different countries04: I have worked in 15 of them05: I play 3 instruments (piano, drums, violin - in that order of experience)06: I was born into the special elect of the social hierarchy07: (I do not have the funds to which most would expect for that hereditary position)08: I am able to write creatively09: I am

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115268611931348782005-05-04T21:49:00.000-07:002006-06-07T21:29:42.876-07:00

Idealist temperment testing resultsIdealists, as a temperament, are passionately concerned with personal growth and development. Idealists strive to discover who they are and how they can become their best possible self -- always this quest for self-knowledge and self-improvement drives their imagination. And they want to help others make the journey. Idealists are naturally drawn to working with

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115268332554080292005-05-04T21:37:00.000-07:002006-06-07T21:30:17.496-07:00

Profile: INFJRevision: 3.01Date of Revision: 6 Mar 2005Beneath the quiet exterior, INFJs hold deep convictions about the weightier matters of life. Those who are activists -- INFJs gravitate toward such a role -- are there for the cause, not for personal glory or political power.INFJs are champions of the oppressed and downtrodden. They often are found in the wake of an emergency, rescuing those

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115255301722681992005-05-04T17:57:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:31:54.010-07:00

Slowly, with his eyes still closed, the world around him comes into focus... waves caressing the beach, dogs barking, with children's laughter over top... he lays, quietly bringing it all into himself, with the peace of it all...His eyes open, and the warmth of the morning sunlight caresses his face with a gentle kiss... a smile spreads across his face. It is another glorious day. The scent of

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115232293172348912005-05-04T11:44:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:32:34.180-07:00

Inside the cage he watches her move to and fro, pacing and cowering in the corners. Moving and jumping at every sound. He is sad at it, wondering why she won't let herself out of it. In the one corner is a dish marked pain and hurt, filled with rotten fish and and moldy bread. In another corner is a bowl marked freedom. With fresh fruit and spring water sitting in ice.Around her neck is a key,

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115172362273707722005-05-03T18:58:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:33:36.960-07:00

With everything that everyone has done within their own lives. And each of us whom have hurt others. With each of the times that we have hurt others, or acted completely insane, or out of character, and wished that we could be forgiven and take back what we have done. As we torment and torture ourselves in pain for what we've done.How is it? That we forget that very thing, when someone hurts us

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115145649537654592005-05-03T11:40:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:34:35.310-07:00

Be gracious to me Lord by your mercy, and by your many mercies, please blot out all of my transgressions. Wash me completely from all of my iniquities, and cleans me of all of my sins. I know Lord that all of my sins are countinually against me, and against you only have I sinned. Please purify me with hyssop so I will be clean, and wash me so that i will be more whiter than snow.Please create

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115077675715038052005-05-02T16:34:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:35:23.363-07:00

(j wrote....)he watches her, sitting at the desk in the high back dining chair, her head leaning over the papers on the desk, hands clasped behind her back between her and the back of the chair... walking up behind her careful not to disturb her in thought, he forms a circle with his index finger and thumb, wrapping them around her wrist, whispering in her ear, "click, i just cuffed you, you're

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115072325191862522005-05-02T15:18:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:36:00.860-07:00

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog. That basically means that most of you can leave comments and carry on with life as usual. On the other hand, my one and only stalker will give me all her tech information and I can track her with the already useful bevy of emails she's sent over the years to throw her psycho stalking ass in jail.:D don't you just love modern

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115071751057642902005-05-02T15:07:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:37:08.306-07:00

The Battle is Won!We searched far and wide, both high and low to route out the enemy. Failing to expose him, we returned defeated…Only to discover that we had searched in vain - the enemy was within…We had gone to war, but we were defeated before we reached the battlefield. For we did not recognize the enemy, nor could we recognize his attacks or from where it would come. We were at a loss as to

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115070858916353852005-05-02T14:47:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:40:44.336-07:00

it occured to me, that the iggy list for yahoo, and the archives, if one never goes into a chatroom, are pointless. So... knowing this, i have cleared the entire archives directory, cleared out my iggybin, and reset everything to defaults. Stripped my contact list back to its original "pre-chat" format, and now everything in life should return to normal.That was one experience i never want to go

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115054336738077212005-05-02T10:11:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:41:29.943-07:00

cold turkey from a pack and a half of cigs a day, non filtered (cuz i rip the filters off)i'd give you a day 1 to day 3 synopsis, but i can't remember them really. I know i was agitated and irratable, and really angry for no apparant reason, and i'm sure, in a couple of weeks everything that has happened by this brutal attempt at quitting smoking will suddenly come rushing to the front of my

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1114373297365979232005-05-02T00:53:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:42:03.556-07:00

For all the pain inside,the seeds of hurt arrive,to plant a single grain,and choke the rosebed lain.For everyone of us,which wrestle with our trust,to ache in bitter rear,and chained by choking fear.Now this I've learned as well,Through lifes hard aching swell,That only through a hope,is freedom from this rope.Forgiveness is the knife,Which restores heart to life,To cut the cords which bind,for

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1115011026840641262005-05-01T22:11:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:42:54.503-07:00

...get back to work, when you go to your programs menu, and the auto memory has totally different "recently used applications" and all the normal stuff is gone....yup... I have been in this cave for a month. grrrrrr

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1114764839588020062005-04-29T01:53:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:44:13.680-07:00

Your name alone strikes fear into others; but maybe, just maybe, there's a little vulnerability and weakness beneath that stoic, fierce exterior of yours. Take the What Pulp Fiction Character Are You? quiz.

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12403376.post-1114365882165311262005-04-24T10:54:00.000-07:002005-05-06T14:46:01.826-07:00

So, my other blog is closed.5 Years of writing, which has now come to an end.A new beginning in my heart, and in my spirit delivers this blog...because tomorrow is here today...faith is the hope of receiving the very thing yet unseen(hebrews 11:1 : personalized)If you hope to receive and perceive the fruits of truth toward the secret desires in your heart.First you must forgive yourself.Then you

James Mendhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11566869838396774559noreply@blogger.com0